Just this morning, our neighbor in Ermita where my ex-hubby used to live called up. She said that my ex-J sought a favor to ask me to sign "some papers" he will be sending from the land of greener pasture. She didn't have to elaborate on that since after 8 years of living apart, everybody knows how the story is going to end. I felt indifference during the first 5 minutes of our conversation. But as I slowly analyze the situation, I came to comprehend that we, meaning my daughter and I, will be on the losing end.
On my way to pick up my kid from my parents' house, I kept on thinking on why does a relationship have to end when the only setback is the distance between two people. Doesn't love count anymore? How about when you share a kid you both wanted to have? For 8 years, I couldn't think of a single bickering that we had. Money was not an issue for I used to believe that THAT alone cannot make a relationship. We both worked: HE, to build a foundation for himself as he used to say; and ME, to sustain the beautiful child he left behind. I know that I was half to be blamed because I also lost track of time managing my work and my household.
I have always loved him, despite the pain he has given me. Even before I got the news, there was a tiny hope that maybe, just maybe, my family will be one again. He formed a great part of my youth and I couldn't be what I am now, if not for the memories he has given me. I know that he truly loved me in the past. What has happened has been beyond my control and yet I was still blessed with a daughter who has been my inspiration. I may not bear a child anymore due to health reasons, but what I have now is more than enough for me to be thankful.
As I always say, everything has a reason. God may have closed a door, but I know that He will open a window...
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